In the past few months my self schooling project has taken a scientific bent. Most of my mental space has been filled with learning new medical vocabulary while I've been so sick. It is not fun but at least for now it's essential.

And now that I'm able to take some time off from work to rest and get better I feel like I'm ready for some more focused learning. I'm pretending that I'm a delicate Victorian lady whose doctor has sent her to take the sea air for a spell. Except in my imagination I will return with total health not to end up in a sanitarium ;)

Random Updates:

I love this list of graded piano pieces from the Piano World forums. I am bored to death with my sonatina book but I don't have the energy or finances for formal lessons again right now. I am hoping to steer myself in the right direction with this list.

And I adore this TED talk about classical music. I want to read Benjamin Zander's book which thankfully my library has a copy of. It also renewed my serious lust for the Teaching Company's How to Listen to and Understand Great Music. I need to watch those sales!


Another interesting talk from Ken Robinson:


And finally, I think this woman is fascinating. After watching her videos and reading her blog I find myself browsing the SAT prep books on Amazon. I love her determination!

Self Study Update IV

The only area of my self schooling goals that I seem able to devote consistent daily time to of late is piano. Which is ok with me. Baby steps!

I have been trying to practice at least 30 minutes each day and to do more than just play through the hymn book or a Broadway book. I'm still working on the Debussy arabesque but I have added in a Clementi sonatina that I had been working on during my last round of formal lessons. I'm making myself focus on all that tedious stuff like phrasing and dynamics... I probably really do need a teacher again to hold me to this.

And all this daily practice has made a big improvment on my multi-octave scales. I can finally play both hands, 2 octaves, quickly with the correct fingering! Boring? Very much so but so satisfying to finally be getting better even just a teeny tiny bit.

Another thing that has helped is carrying my  music with me to school on days I have to stay late. I've been able to practice (and relax) a bit after the kids leave and before I head to my meetings.

In French news, I have a new goal. I'm trying to read the Louis Segond translation of the Bible. It is slow going but so interesting. I'm in Genesis (and probably will be for quite a while) but it is fascinating to go back and forth between the French and the KJV. I found this free audio online as well but the reader goes really fast for me. Parts of this feel like a tongue twister to me- bone of my bone en francais is beyond my pronunciation abilities at this point!

Genèse 2:23

Et l`homme dit: Voici cette fois celle qui est os de mes os et chair de ma chair! on l`appellera femme, parce qu`elle a été prise de l`homme.

I'm still working away at my Debussy piece which is making me happy because I'm starting to be able to play it at the appropriate tempo (at least in some parts). But then I pulled out my Sonata book from my last round of formal piano lessons which was about a year ago at this point. I am so irritated with myself because I can see exactly where I left off when I stopped working with my teacher and it's hard not to focus on the progress I could have made. I keep thinking someday I'll figure out the secret to getting myself on the piano bench everyday for an hour but that day has yet to come!

I am trying to be more focused in my practice this week. I've been reading a lot about keeping a practice journal as well as having goals, even simple ones, for each practice session. So I'm going to try that out and see what happens. I'm also going to add in some scales (which I've been skipping out on) and also actually work on (as opposed to glossing over the hard parts) of a piano arrangement of Blessed Assurance that I've been messing around with for the past month or so.

And here is why I love wasting time on youtube:
Debussy's Arabesque 1 on harp:


Which leads me down the path of wishing I could play the harp and all these lovely videos :)

Another Reason to Homeschool

I am not one of those homeschooling advocates who thinks that all public schools are beyond hope or that all families should homeschool. Far from it.

My school is small, family oriented, and academically strong. I don't know how I got so lucky to land here after college because I hear teacher friends in other school districts talk about their days and it leaves me in  state of shock and horror about what they have to deal with. I find the easiest way to describe my school is to say that I teach at the school Beaver Cleaver went to in the 50's somehow trapped in a time warp here in 2010.

That's not to say we don't have problems but for the most part our families are strong & intact, teachers are respected, classes are small, and there is a strong emphasis on basic academics enriched by the arts. We also have long standing traditions of boy and girl scouting at our school. I think the main reason my school has remained a place that Beaver would find familiar is our small, isolated community whose members donate an obscene amount of money to keep our programs afloat. In a way we're like a private/public school hybrid. The "suggested" donation at my school per child is $1,000 and that is not including "fees" for art supplies, field trips, class parties, assemblies, classroom supplies, book orders, book fairs, etc, etc, etc. So much for free public education, right?

That is me being wordy to say these families are paying out of pocket a ridiculous amount of money to have their kids in a sweltering, decrepit, classroom everyday with a teacher who is focused on the most unruly students and those who are struggling with serious learning issues. That is the harsh reality.

I try my best to support all my students but in the end I am just one person. No matter how much I try, how much I give, how much I pour myself into my classroom & my students if one of my 6 year olds decides to throw a grand, screaming tantrum (which happened today) or one decides to attack another (which also happened today), or someone throws up in the classroom (thankfully only a false alarm today), that is who my attention is going to turn to out of necessity and practicality. So much for that enriching lesson for my higher readers or the new math game I was going to introduce or honestly even just the extra, fun things I do with my kids (goodbye apple pies we had planned to bake). It all goes out the window in those moments.

If these children were in a homeschool environment each would receive the focused, attention he or she needs in a much more time efficient way. So much of the school day is learning procedures that don't matter for your academic outcomes later in life (lining up, assemblies, waiting for everyone else to quiet down, waiting while your teacher has to deal with another child's special circumstance, etc).

I really enjoy my job and find it fulfilling (most of the time) but I cannot imagine seeing my own future children in a classroom setting like the one I spend my days in. Some of my co-workers are admirable, caring teachers. Honestly, I know many of them do a better job than I do and I still wouldn't want my children in their classrooms. It doesn't matter to me how loving and talented the teacher is, the setting is still all wrong. Spending my days teaching in a classroom, it's funny to me that I still feel this way but if anything being a classroom teacher has just made my desire to homeschool even stronger than before I taught.

I think this is all coming out in my end of the day, end of the week stream of consciousness because we had such a rough week at school. I have never had so many children with serious behavioral issues (not to mention learning issues) in one class and as a result we are still focusing on learning routines & appropriate ways to act at school here at week 6.

I'm exhausted everyday. I have a headache everyday. My throat hurts everyday. My face hurts from trying to keep smiling. And I just feel sad for the 5 kids in my class who are ready to learn, who have lovely manners, and who spend a big part of their day at school waiting for their classmates to listen. It should not have to be that way.

And all I can think is that if they were at home things would be so different.

Self Study Update III

What a stressful week this has been! My root canal tooth has been acting up and I succumbed to my first illness of the school year. Sadly it didn't take too long for that to happen this time. I have high hopes for a completely healthy year someday. I guess I need more  vitamins and hand sanitizer! Because of all this I have made less progress this week than I had hoped for:

French:
I started the next chapter in my book when I realized that it begins with the irregular verbs that I know well (avoir, etre, aller) but I am still hoping to really improve my -ir verbs with the spelling changes.  I need to clear some space on my hard drive so I can download the verb drills I found last week.

Poetry:
What can I say, it's still in my pocket! ;)

Piano:
I've been playing this a lot lately, albeit much more slowly than in this video.



Nora and I went to a book signing a few weeks ago with a bunch of teen authors which was really fun. Someone asked the panel for writing advice and one bit has stuck with me. Margaret Stohl said that she works on the bic principle (butt in chair) and that a big part of writing is just forcing yourself to start and do it even if it is just for 15 minutes.

I'm trying to apply that to a lot of my endeavors as I feel myself getting stressed & tired from work every day. It is hard not to just collapse onto the sofa some days and rendezvous with my good friend JB Fletcher

I am telling myself I can play the piano for just 15 minutes or conjugate French verbs for 15 minutes or read a little bit of Who Killed Homer and I find once I start it's easier to go longer than the original 15 minutes.It's the getting started that is the biggest challenge for me.

Somehow giving myself permission to quit after 15 minutes is making a difference in my attitude. And I really do quit after 15 minutes sometimes. But I'm also trying to keep in mind some advice from Eat Pray Love: "you must be very polite with yourself when you are learning something new."

Self Study Update II

Last night was Back to School Night for the parents in my class which is always a huge production with so many things to get ready. Things went smoothly but I am relieved it is over! At this point the school year starts to flow a little bit smoother and I go back to feeling like I have some sort of a life outside of school. 

French:
I finished up the first chapter in my French verb book on schedule and realized that I am very rusty on anything but present tense regular -er verbs. I am not going to start the second chapter until I practice and review the other regular verb conjugations and get more comfortable with them. I started googling and found some great resources to focus on verbs:

I like this powerpoint about "boot verbs" a lot and plan to print it out to cut up as flash cards. But I am most excited about this website I found, frenchtoday.com . I want to order the French Verb Drills I and French Greetings & Politeness. I love that I could practice while I drive to work and I like that the instructor has placed the emphasis on pronunciation. Everything offered on her site looks like something I would like to try out.

More French Links:
Francais interactif

The French Workshop
This site made me so nostalgic for Madame Pantzer, my high school French teacher. I loved all the posters of Paris she had on her classroom walls and I used to think I would be a French teacher like her (that pesky issue of fluency pretty much stopped that plan!) and be decorating a French classroom someday. I do think some of these books would be helpful to me because they are so simple.

French Flash Cards

Poetry:
I haven't done much with my chosen poem other than carry it around all week in my own personal poem in your pocket celebration. But I know it's there and I'm taking baby steps. I have been pulling it out and reading it a few times throughout the day.

Back to School Update

It is week 3 of first grade with my new class and thankfully we are all starting to settle in. I knew I was winning them over when I heard one little boy whisper to another, "she is just so funny" (in a complimentary seven year old boy way, I promise!) and that has kept me going on the long, hot days. But I have to say, the temperature in my non air conditioned school is yet another reason to homeschool! My poor students have been so uncomfortably hot and sweaty. It is really challenging for them (and me) to want to keep working & learning when we're so miserable.

I do like my job a lot but I always forget how exhausting the start of a new school year is with getting to know all the new families and learning everybody's routine. Because of that, I am scaling back my self-study plans a bit for the fall which I am hoping will make them a bit more realistic and attainable for me.

French:
 My goal is to work through one chapter a week in Barron's French Verb Workbook. I'm also going to keep up my hodge podge Francophone music/magazine/movie intake as much as I can. I've been listening to Feist sing en francais a lot during my commute:




 Poetry/Memory Work:
I have very little experience memorizing poetry so I'm not sure how this will actually play out. But I think this is an appropriate selection given my recent pledge to stop buying books (at least until I make a significant dent in those I already own). And I have always loved Wordsworth so I'm going to give it a go.

"THE WORLD IS TOO MUCH WITH US; LATE AND SOON"

THE world is too much with us; late and soon,
          Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers:
          Little we see in Nature that is ours;
          We have given our hearts away, a sordid boon!
          The Sea that bares her bosom to the moon;
          The winds that will be howling at all hours,
          And are up-gathered now like sleeping flowers;
          For this, for everything, we are out of tune;
          It moves us not.--Great God! I'd rather be
          A Pagan suckled in a creed outworn;                         10
          So might I, standing on this pleasant lea,
          Have glimpses that would make me less forlorn;
          Have sight of Proteus rising from the sea;
          Or hear old Triton blow his wreathed horn.
                                                              1806.

One of my favorite moments at the end of last school year was when one of our volunteers, a retired teacher in her eighties recited "Daffodils" for the first graders, who were, surprisingly, quite a polite audience. And I've thought that would be another good poem to try to memorize. Maybe later this year. But I'm also being tempted to try to memorize this one which always makes me think of Bridget Jones in her boat with Daniel Cleaver!

Other than my French and poem memorization I'm going to keep myself free and see what happens as the fall unfolds. I've got Latin, Welsh, some math review, grammar, piano (mostly trying to be consistent with Hanon and scales amidst playing for fun in my living room cabaret act) and of course the books I'm in the middle of reading to pull from as well. I love making lists (for me, the fun seems to be in the list making not so much the checking off of items) so my original plans had formal goals for each area which just isn't realistic for my schedule right now.

It will be interesting to see if I actually stick to any of this!